4th Annual JW Kickball & Kegger Fest

In true John style, a hearty party was held yesterday as we celebrated the 4th Annual JW Kickball & Kegger Fest. Thanks to all who made the day such a joyous event. Click on the following photo to see pictures of the delightful afternoon.

4th Annual JW Kickball & Kegger Fest

Save the date: June 18, 2011 for the 5th Annual Kickball & Kegger Fest in honor of JW.

34 Years Ago Today

To My First Born Son:

It was Fathers' Day then, too; the day that you came into this world, June 20, 1976. Our lives, of course, became enriched beyond description from that moment forward. We were blessed with having you with us physically for over 30 years. Your presence has not, however, ceased since then. You continue to touch the lives of those who love you, family and friends alike. Even more so, you have a positive affect on so many who did not have the privilege of knowing you in this life but can still experience your presence and love of life through those who did know you and who you have touched in such a profound manner. Thank you, JW, for making me a father for the first time 34 years ago; thank you for making me the man I have become.

For those not familiar with it, John's birth story can be found here.

A Special Godfather for a Special Girl

Last weekend, John's niece, Ariana, was baptized in John's old parish, the one which his mom & dad still attend and from which John was buried. Ariana is fortunate to have a tremendous man such as John as her uncle and now she also has him as her godfather. Everyone needs someone in Heaven watching out for them and Ariana is fortunate to have her Uncle John fulfilling that role. John's dad had the honor to stand in for John at the actual Christening. The cirdle of life continues. Click on the picture below to see more.

Ariana Grace's Christening

Running with John in Quantico

Well, John, it's summertime again, and it is time to lace up those running shoes and run some races. This year, your niece has taken on the role of cheerleader and motivator. Yesterday, we went out to run the Marine Corps Crossroads 17.75km race down in Quantico. It was a good race, good weather and a good length.

However, John was never partial to trail running. In his days of running Rock Creek Park in DC, he would always stick to the paved trails. In that, this race went a little off-road; with a lot of gravel trails through the forest and a lot of hills. But it was a good challenge none the less.

Luckily enough, we have a number one fan in Ariana, and will continue the tradition and motto:

"Running with John!"

A Truly Fitting Memorial for John

This past weekend, St. Joseph's Parish in Morganza celebrated the 150th anniversary of the church building (the parish dates back to the 17th century, shortly after the founding of Maryland). In preparation of this anniversary, much of the artwork was restored in the church. In addition, a new altar and pulpit were installed. The altar was just blessed by the Archbishop on Pentecost Sunday.

John's mom & dad are fortunate to have been able to contribute the pulpit in JW's memory. This seemed fitting in so many ways -- it is not only the spot from which John's dad has the honor of proclaiming God's Word as a lector at Mass, but it is also the spot from which he delivered John's eulogy -- an obligation which no father wants to endure but is obligated to fulfill nonetheless.

For generations to come, people who see the pulpit and hear the Word of God proclaimed from it will know that John William loved and was loved.

An Opportunity to Make a Difference

John's mom Relays in memory of JW, her Dad, and her mother-in-law and because she wants to see an end to cancer during her lifetime. Relay gives John's mom the unique opportunity to celebrate the lives of those who have battled cancer, such as her father-in-law -- "Papa", remember loved ones lost such as JW, her Dad, and "Mammy," and support the American Cancer Society’s lifesaving mission by fighting back against a disease that has already taken too much.

Please support John's mom's efforts to fight back against cancer by joining my Relay For Life® team or making a donation by clicking on this link. You can make a one-time gift or increase your impact by making a monthly donation to support the cause.

Your efforts will help the American Cancer Society fund groundbreaking cancer research, provide up-to-date cancer information, advocate for all people to have access to screening and treatment, and offer free programs and services to improve the quality of life for people facing cancer. By being a part of Relay, we are joining a worldwide movement to help defeat cancer for future generations.

Uncle John's Youngest Hokie

Well Uncle John, it has been a long nine months but I finally made it into this world. Three days ago, my world changed forever, but I am loving where I am at right now. Mom and Dad are teaching me well, except Dad is having a hard time explaining to me what a Hokie is. Dad spent last night telling me the story about the Dave Matthews Band concert you guys went to at RFK Stadium and how you and him shared many experiences; traveling to foreign countries, Hokie football, concerts, and enjoying to the fullest hanging out with good friends and family.

I guess that I have a lot to live up to with the Leonard last name. But, I really look forward to it, and I hope that I will be lucky enough to experience as many good times as you and Dad had together.

The first three days have been pretty easy, a lot of eating, a lot of sleeping and a lot of #2. I appreciate your love for Dave Matthews also, his music was the only thing that got me through my first traffic jam yesterday on my way home from the hospital. I hear that that is the norm for I-95 in Northern Virginia, a ton of traffic at any time of the day; kind of crazy, huh?

So, I had a chance to meet some of the family. Moma Reesie and Pop has been around a lot in the first couple of days. Moma Reesie actually met me at home the first day after the hospital and spent time with me. Aunt Jes (AJ) came down from some other planet called Ithaca, New York to spend time at the hospital too. Mom's family came to see me also, Aunt Melissa, Grandma and Grandpa, and Mom's cousin Ron. Mom was ecstatic when Aunt Jessica and Uncle Ed came all of the way up from Norfolk and Aunt Sara stopped by too. Great Aunt Meg, Ticia and Susan all sent their love to me the first hours of my life.

I must admit, Uncle John, we have an extraordinary family. With that, I will be sure to update you on the happenings of my young life. Now, time for a nap, and I am a little hungry also; got to go find Mom.

Love,
Your niece
Ariana

Big Brother Duties

We were talking about our favorite John stories last night in remembrance and I kept this one to post.
For my first college senior game at St. Mary's College (when I was a senior in academic standing, not yet realizing that since I was only a third year in sport standing and that I would return for a fourth soccer season) John was my family member to walk me out on the field. It was in the middle of the week and both Mom and Dad were out of town that week (but made all other home games). So John took off work and came all the way down to St. Mary's County to walk me to center field as they introduced me with the rest of my senior class. I don't really remember the game or if we won, but I do remember him cheering for me when I made a save in the first half. (He left before the end of the game to return back to work). It really meant a lot to me but even more to him because it gave him a free card to not attend my three hour college graduation ceremony but was sure there for the after party. (And at this time, I do have to give props to Mike for flying out to Southern MD to make the ceremony and surprise me.)
Thanks John for walking me out.

And this post is in true John form, since it is a whole day late.

Love you and Miss you a lot!
Your little Sis.

Today

Three years - it certainly doesn't get easier with time. In fact, as if it was even possible, it seems as if we miss you even more, JW.

What becomes clearer, however, is how your legacy is continuing on in the lives of your loved ones. Like the ripples of a stone dropped into a pond, the inspiration you provide to family and friend alike continues to have a profound impact. Rather than mourn the circumstances of your death we instead celebrate the way you lived God's gift of life.

Yes, spring does renew

Tomorrow is Easter, a day of personal rebirth and renewal. The cherry blossoms are a perfect visual reminder of the possibility of that renewal.

The Japanese celebrate Hanami, the viewing of the flowers or cherry blossoms (sakura). It is one of the happiest events celebrated in Japan. It heralds the coming of spring and the end of a long cold winter. For the Japanese it also offers a deeper meaning. As the flowers disappear shortly, it is believed the sakura echo the transitory nature of our lives here on earth.

Hanami, however, is wildly celebrated in Japan with family and friends. Outdoor parties well into the night celebrate cherry blossoms, spring, family, life and love.

A few years ago, JW witnessed the beauty these blossoms have to offer. Somehow, I think he would agree with the Japanese and find they offer a great opportunity to celebrate life and the gifts each of us have received, including JW's love and friendship.

Life Renews

John's memorial, this day.

Note this difference in the trees from 1 year ago.

Save the Date

The Warmth of Uncle John

This past Saturday, Momma Reesie presented Gina and Mike with a quilt for our first grandchild, Ariana Grace. The quilt is made from pieces of JW's clothing -- a warm reminder for Ariana of her Uncle John. (Click on the photo to see a mother's and grandmother's love in action through the making of the quilt).

Warmth of Uncle John

3rd Annual JW Kickball & Kegger Fest

The tradition that started here and here continued today. Click on the photos below to see the album of John's family and friends remembering John the way he wants to be -- with a good time being had by all.

Of the many highlights was the Guinness cake Megan so thoughtfully had made and brought to the party.

Also, unlike last year, we have actual pictures of the kickball game courtesy of Nicole.

Be sure to mark your calendars now. The plan is to start off each summer with John's kickball game and kegger on the weekend closest to his birthday which means next year's will be on June, 19, 2010.

3rd Annual John Kickball & Kegger Fest

Memories from One of John's Best Buds

One of John's best buds from his days in Belgium was Keith. Starting in the 7th Grade, Keith and John would form a life long bond which included JW serving as Keith's Best Man at his wedding.

Recently, Keith was kind enough to share some sentiments as well as photos of John, not only from Keith's wedding, but from the time when Keith and his family visited us in beautiful Southern Maryland and JW introduced Keith's son to the intricacies of crabbing. Also included is a photo of JW and Keith from their times in Belgium.

Warm memories -- part of JW's continuing legacy.

Click on the photo above in order to enlarge, as well as the album below in order to see the complete set of pictures.

Thank you for sharing, Keith.

Keith & JW

As Always -- It's the Smile

Pictures of JW from the Fourth and Seventh grades courtesy of John's classmate and John's Mom's fellow teacher, Jen. (Click on pictures to enlarge).These pictures and the warm memories they bring back are, of course, from Mother Catherine Spalding School where John's legacy (and his smile) continues through the Technology Fund established in his memory.

Music and the Circle of Life

Of all the human experiences, listening to and enjoying music can be the most "soulful," an experience which differentiates humans from all of God's other creatures.

In that regard, it was only after his death that we learned of John's love of the Dave Mathews Band (DMB) and how he was the one to introduce his little brother Mike to their music. Since then, Mike & Gina have become veritable DMB groupies. The Saturday before last, after attending a DMB concert the night before, Mike and Gina took John's Mom & Dad to their first Dave Matthews Band concert at the Nissan Pavilion in Northern Virginia. It proved to be a truly memorable experience.

It was there, while tailgating in the parking lot before the concert, that Mike pulled out a bottle of champagne. While Mom thought that they were about to offer a toast to buying a new house, Dad knew intuitively what the toast was for -- to us becoming grandparents for the first time.

The joy of realizing that Mike and Gina were to become parents themselves was overwhelming. And in a very special way, it was entirely appropriate to learn of this extraordinarily happy news at a Dave Matthews Band concert -- a place where we were able to be in touch with JW's music loving soul. It is now also the place where we first realized that JW is about to become Uncle Johnny -- a role he will fulfill in the same extraordinary way he did as a son, brother, fiance, grandson, nephew, cousin, and friend extraordinaire. For John's legacy continues to live on and he continues to touch the everyday lives of so many. And now, he will have the opportunity to touch the lives of future generations as well.

The circle of life continues.

Angels

Some pictures require no words.

John Was There

This past weekend, Mark and Emily were wed in Jamaica -- Mark being one of John's best buds. (This, of course, was the Caribbean nation of Jamaica, as opposed to Jamaica, Queens, were John's parents were wed almost 35 years ago).

Jamaica the island is distinguished from Jamaica, Queens in many ways, not least with regard to the selection of available beers. While Jamaica, Queens has a plethora of beers from which to choose, on the island, there is only one, Red Stripe. Above is a picture of Mike having a Red Stripe on the way from the airport after landing in Jamaica.

Of course, John was there in spirit to help Mark and Emily commemorate their joyous occasion. JW's presence clearly called for a toast, but somehow a toast with Red Stripe did not seem appropriate. Therefore, Mark arranged to have 15 bottles of Guinness flown in for the occasion and graciously offered a toast to John, who most assuredly was sharing in Mark's & Emily's joy.

In addition, for those not involved in the toast, Emily assured that the chocolate half the the wedding cake, which actually consisted of cupcakes, was made from the special recipe she developed for John's first annual beer keg and kickball fest (see here, here, and here). At that event, Emily served a cake made from a Guinness cake batter with Bailey's icing, which are also the ingredients of a drink John liked -- the "Irish Car Bomb."

JW Continues to Look After His Little Sis

Recall this post from almost two years ago when we packed up John's condo and brought his belongings to his parent's home. His possessions in so many different ways reflected John's personality and spirit. As such, it is entirely appropriate that a lot of John's possessions this week ended up in Ithaca, NY with John's sister. John was always very protective and supportive of his little sis, and he continues to do so today by having his personality and spirit accompany her as she moved onto the next stage of her life.

Having finished her Masters program, John's sis has moved into an early 20th century Victorian three blocks from downtown Ithaca. You can see how John's possessions grace her new abode by clicking on the below picture album.

Ithaca Redux

Living the Life, Johnny 5 Style

Well, it has been two plus years,

and many things have happened since I last saw you.

Many birthdays; two of mine and three of yours,

Countless parties; some with friends and some with family,

Many Redskins games (yes more losses than wins),

and a few road trips to Hokie football games.

There has been a wedding (and a kick ass one at that)

and a few trips taken; some overseas, some out west,

and even some to good ole Ithaca, NY.

Jobs have changed, and some have even retired.

There have been many Dave Matthews concerts, and

even a few Coldplay concerts.

Through events large and small,

you have been right there with us,

in spirit and in thought,

every hour of every day.

As for traditions, I also have John to thank for the bill at dinner last night.

Gina and I have made it a tradition to go out to eat at Levante’s at Dupont Circle in DC on John’s birthday. Levante’s was one of John’s favorite restaurants in DC. It is a Turkish restaurant with a huge sidewalk outdoor seating section reminiscent of a European café. During the summer, it is a great place to sit outside and enjoy some good food (and really good bread). And in pure John fashion, each year we bring with us a $5.99 bottle of “VT Hokie Bird Red” wine to celebrate. (The label does not even specify what kind of red wine, and that is your selection at the store, “red” or “white”) Well, two years down and two years in a row the bill has come and the restaurant has not included their $15 corking fee for the wine. So, thanks John, I know you had a hand in it! It would be a shame to pay a $15 corking fee on a $5.99 bottle of wine!

Miss ya, Bro.

A special request

As a special Father's day gift, I e-mailed Vin Scelsa, the dj of Idiot's Delight on WFUV. This is the radio show that dad has posted previously on the blog. I was going to surprise him by requesting a special song on this Saturday show, since it's the day before Father's Day and John's birthday. Unfortunately, I was not able to persuade him (clearly, if it was in person, there might have been a different outcome)but Mr. Scelsa did send a nice e-mail response that I give to Dad (and mom) for Father's Day. (Hey who else can say they gave Vin to Dad?)

"It is very difficult for me to acknowledge letters like this on the air and to fulfill such a request/dedication. I normally do not do so. Not because i don't sympathize with the people and families who write to me, but because if I started doing such things I would be inundated with similar requests.

I am humbled by the fact that your folks think so highly of my show. My heart goes out to them - and your entire family - over your loss. Please accept these words as my contribution to your Father's Day. I trust you'll understand why I couldn't say anything on the air.

Peace,
Vin Scelsa"

Things I Learned from My Son

Today being Fathers’ Day (and JW being born on Fathers’ Day) it seems an appropriate day to reflect upon the things I learned from my son.

Of course, it was from John’s Papa that I learned how to be a father – the best role model a son could ask for.

Also, it was because John’s Mammy & Papa took in foster babies while I was growing up that I learned how to change a dirty diaper and all the other logistics of fatherhood long before JW was born.

But from JW, being our first born, I learned the awesome responsibility of having another human being be totally dependent upon you.

I learned from my son (and from his Mama) what it feels like to love someone more than the gift of life itself.

I learned from JW that a parent’s ability to help shape another’s character ends at a pretty early age – that before you know it, you’ve done all you can do as a parent and that ultimately it is up to the child to make the most of what he is given, from both God and his parents.

I learned from my son the need to recognize life as the gift it is and the need to live it to the fullest at all times – an accomplishment at which JW doubtlessly succeeded.

I learned from JW the sheer joy of watching your boy grow up to be a good man – a very good man indeed.

I learned from my son how it is possible to live a truly holy life in a very unassuming way.

I learned from JW (and all my children) that a parent becomes truly wise when he recognizes just how much he can learn from his children.

I learned from my son what “Thy Will Be Done” means; that it simply means “my will not be done,” no matter how worthy and just I believe it to be. It does not necessarily mean God wills the opposite – it just means that I cannot live life expecting my will to prevail, no matter how noble I may think it is.

Finally, and most importantly, I learned from my son a better, albeit still imperfect, understanding of the loving, vulnerable, defenseless, and self-emptying generosity of God and his invitation to us to share in it.

Blessed

They say it’s the darkest right before the dawn

They say once you’ve hit rock bottom, you can only go up

They say time will heal…

That’s what they say, but do they really know?

What do I know?

I know your smile

I know your infectious laugh

I know your past mistakes

I know your fun times

I know the impact you’ve made,

Like footprints in the sand

Except unlike the beach that can wash away,

These footprints are forever on our hearts.

They say love makes us stronger

They say once you lose a person, he can live on in memories

They say time will heal…

That’s what they say, but do I really know?

What do I say?

I say I see your smile

I hear your laugh

I learn from your mistakes

I laugh at your fun times

I say I am blessed

For John on his birthday

A Day of Memories, Too

In addition to the post below, JW's birthday brings to mind so many splendid memories.

We were married less than a year when we thought that John's Mom was pregnant. We even went out and brought a bottle of champagne to celebrate. However, this was in the days before in-home pregnancy test kits and when the test results came back from the doctor's office, the word was that "the rabbit lived."

Nonetheless, John's Mom went back for another test in the following week or two and this time we got to open the champagne bottle when the test results came back "the rabbit died."

Next came the challenge of breaking the news to the rest of the family. It was November and we were at JW's Mammy and Papa's home and everyone was there, to include John's Grandma, to celebrate John's Dad's birthday. Following the cake and candles, John's Mom handed John's Dad a birthday card to "Daddy," and thus everyone came to know that JW was on his way.

When JW was eventually born, it was, of course, June. John's Mom & Dad were laying in bed in Great Neck, NY watching on TV the NBC Saturday Night at the Movies presentation of "The Battle of the Bulge" staring Henry Fonda, among others. In the middle of the movie, John's Mom's water breaks and we immediately head for the hospital where he was to be born, Syosset Hospital on Long Island. We never did get to learn who eventually won that battle.

The old saw is that early pregnancies are hard, and later pregnancies are easier. For John's Mom, the opposite was true; JW was the easiest and Jes was the hardest. In fact, upon arrival at the hospital in the middle of the night, the nurses noted that John's Mom was already dilating and immediately called the obstetrician. However, time passed and still no doctor. The nurse eventually called backed and it turned out that the doctor had rolled-over and had went back to sleep. He eventually got to the hospital and upon examination, immediately rolled John's Mom into the delivery room. As it turned out, the doctor came very close to missing the delivery.

Thus was how anxious JW was to enter into this world.

A Day of Celebration!

It was 33 years ago today, almost a third of a century ago, that JW came into this world. It is truly a day of celebration -- a day in which we commemorate what was -- not mourn what might have been. Everyone who was touched by John during the 30 short years he spent on this earth was truly blessed -- most of all John's parents. We are blessed not only with the thoughts of a life well-lived, but also blessed with found memories of birthday's past.

It wasn't that long ago that we embarrassed John by showing Alex old 8mm films of his first birthday in Hillsborough, NJ with his proud parents, grandparents and aunts in attendance.

We have the memories of birthdays spent at the SkateStation and Chuck E. Cheese's in Southern Maryland. We have the memorable 14th birthday celebrated in Ireland with John's Mammy & Papa during which he was presented with a ring his father wore most of his life and before that, his father's uncle and namesake (Uncle Billy). We never did have the courage to ask John as to the status of that ring until after his death when Alex confirmed that somehow he had lost it years earlier.

While John may not have been very good with protecting keepsakes such as his grand uncle's ring, he was very good at being an extraordinarily thoughtful and loving person to family and friends alike. Let there be no doubt -- the title of this blog solely refers to the too few years we all had to know John. In the years we did have, we all came to know John for the good man that he is.

Although published earlier on this blog, included herein is a copy of the note that John's Mom & Dad included in the birthday card for his 30th (and final) birthday. It says it all -- and we are so thankful that all was said when we had the chance. (Click on letter to read).

To a life well-lived, my son -- may you continue to be an inspiration to others!

Wrong Way Johnny

This past week, we celebrated with other family members the graduation of J.W.'s cousin Lisa from college. A good (and full) time was had by all.

The trip up to Long Island brought back memories of John's trip to Long Island several years ago to celebrate his cousin's graduation from high school. Whereas J.W.'s little brother has a built-in GPS system in his brain, John could get lost crossing the street. Sure enough, driving to Long Island that time, JW got lost on his way to his Aunt Meg's and Uncle Dom's. Fortunately, Long Island is an island and sooner or letter, as long as you don't go in circles, even if you don't know where you are going you'll hit water. Sure enough, after being overdue in his arrival in Hicksville, we got a phone call from John letting us know that he was at Jones Beach and looking for a way back. If not for the Atlantic Ocean, he could have ended up in Florida before he knew it.

You may not have known left from right or north from south while driving my son, but you certainly knew the direction of a life well-lived. Thanks for showing us the way.

Playing NAKID

Recall from earlier posts to include this one John's love of the game of kickball as played on the Mall in the District. We'll, it must have have been a slow news day the other day in that on page one, above the fold no less, the Washington Post had a rather prominent picture of JW's beloved kickball league, NAKID, playing the game on the Mall of our nation's capital. As always, click on the image to the right for a close-up.

Memorializing JW on the Radio

Regular readers of this blog know that a source of solace for John's family is music -- specifically music as played by Fordham University public radio in New York, WFUV. Being public radio, they have periodic fund drives and the other week, in addition to renewing our own membership, we did our best to increase the station's membership in memory of JW, who himself was a great lover of music. Listen to the audio clip as they struggle to figure out Avenue, MD.

A Mother's & Son's Love...

...those who knew JW and his Mom know that it is special.