Save the Date

The Warmth of Uncle John

This past Saturday, Momma Reesie presented Gina and Mike with a quilt for our first grandchild, Ariana Grace. The quilt is made from pieces of JW's clothing -- a warm reminder for Ariana of her Uncle John. (Click on the photo to see a mother's and grandmother's love in action through the making of the quilt).

Warmth of Uncle John

3rd Annual JW Kickball & Kegger Fest

The tradition that started here and here continued today. Click on the photos below to see the album of John's family and friends remembering John the way he wants to be -- with a good time being had by all.

Of the many highlights was the Guinness cake Megan so thoughtfully had made and brought to the party.

Also, unlike last year, we have actual pictures of the kickball game courtesy of Nicole.

Be sure to mark your calendars now. The plan is to start off each summer with John's kickball game and kegger on the weekend closest to his birthday which means next year's will be on June, 19, 2010.

3rd Annual John Kickball & Kegger Fest

Memories from One of John's Best Buds

One of John's best buds from his days in Belgium was Keith. Starting in the 7th Grade, Keith and John would form a life long bond which included JW serving as Keith's Best Man at his wedding.

Recently, Keith was kind enough to share some sentiments as well as photos of John, not only from Keith's wedding, but from the time when Keith and his family visited us in beautiful Southern Maryland and JW introduced Keith's son to the intricacies of crabbing. Also included is a photo of JW and Keith from their times in Belgium.

Warm memories -- part of JW's continuing legacy.

Click on the photo above in order to enlarge, as well as the album below in order to see the complete set of pictures.

Thank you for sharing, Keith.

Keith & JW

As Always -- It's the Smile

Pictures of JW from the Fourth and Seventh grades courtesy of John's classmate and John's Mom's fellow teacher, Jen. (Click on pictures to enlarge).These pictures and the warm memories they bring back are, of course, from Mother Catherine Spalding School where John's legacy (and his smile) continues through the Technology Fund established in his memory.

Music and the Circle of Life

Of all the human experiences, listening to and enjoying music can be the most "soulful," an experience which differentiates humans from all of God's other creatures.

In that regard, it was only after his death that we learned of John's love of the Dave Mathews Band (DMB) and how he was the one to introduce his little brother Mike to their music. Since then, Mike & Gina have become veritable DMB groupies. The Saturday before last, after attending a DMB concert the night before, Mike and Gina took John's Mom & Dad to their first Dave Matthews Band concert at the Nissan Pavilion in Northern Virginia. It proved to be a truly memorable experience.

It was there, while tailgating in the parking lot before the concert, that Mike pulled out a bottle of champagne. While Mom thought that they were about to offer a toast to buying a new house, Dad knew intuitively what the toast was for -- to us becoming grandparents for the first time.

The joy of realizing that Mike and Gina were to become parents themselves was overwhelming. And in a very special way, it was entirely appropriate to learn of this extraordinarily happy news at a Dave Matthews Band concert -- a place where we were able to be in touch with JW's music loving soul. It is now also the place where we first realized that JW is about to become Uncle Johnny -- a role he will fulfill in the same extraordinary way he did as a son, brother, fiance, grandson, nephew, cousin, and friend extraordinaire. For John's legacy continues to live on and he continues to touch the everyday lives of so many. And now, he will have the opportunity to touch the lives of future generations as well.

The circle of life continues.

Angels

Some pictures require no words.

John Was There

This past weekend, Mark and Emily were wed in Jamaica -- Mark being one of John's best buds. (This, of course, was the Caribbean nation of Jamaica, as opposed to Jamaica, Queens, were John's parents were wed almost 35 years ago).

Jamaica the island is distinguished from Jamaica, Queens in many ways, not least with regard to the selection of available beers. While Jamaica, Queens has a plethora of beers from which to choose, on the island, there is only one, Red Stripe. Above is a picture of Mike having a Red Stripe on the way from the airport after landing in Jamaica.

Of course, John was there in spirit to help Mark and Emily commemorate their joyous occasion. JW's presence clearly called for a toast, but somehow a toast with Red Stripe did not seem appropriate. Therefore, Mark arranged to have 15 bottles of Guinness flown in for the occasion and graciously offered a toast to John, who most assuredly was sharing in Mark's & Emily's joy.

In addition, for those not involved in the toast, Emily assured that the chocolate half the the wedding cake, which actually consisted of cupcakes, was made from the special recipe she developed for John's first annual beer keg and kickball fest (see here, here, and here). At that event, Emily served a cake made from a Guinness cake batter with Bailey's icing, which are also the ingredients of a drink John liked -- the "Irish Car Bomb."

JW Continues to Look After His Little Sis

Recall this post from almost two years ago when we packed up John's condo and brought his belongings to his parent's home. His possessions in so many different ways reflected John's personality and spirit. As such, it is entirely appropriate that a lot of John's possessions this week ended up in Ithaca, NY with John's sister. John was always very protective and supportive of his little sis, and he continues to do so today by having his personality and spirit accompany her as she moved onto the next stage of her life.

Having finished her Masters program, John's sis has moved into an early 20th century Victorian three blocks from downtown Ithaca. You can see how John's possessions grace her new abode by clicking on the below picture album.

Ithaca Redux

Living the Life, Johnny 5 Style

Well, it has been two plus years,

and many things have happened since I last saw you.

Many birthdays; two of mine and three of yours,

Countless parties; some with friends and some with family,

Many Redskins games (yes more losses than wins),

and a few road trips to Hokie football games.

There has been a wedding (and a kick ass one at that)

and a few trips taken; some overseas, some out west,

and even some to good ole Ithaca, NY.

Jobs have changed, and some have even retired.

There have been many Dave Matthews concerts, and

even a few Coldplay concerts.

Through events large and small,

you have been right there with us,

in spirit and in thought,

every hour of every day.

As for traditions, I also have John to thank for the bill at dinner last night.

Gina and I have made it a tradition to go out to eat at Levante’s at Dupont Circle in DC on John’s birthday. Levante’s was one of John’s favorite restaurants in DC. It is a Turkish restaurant with a huge sidewalk outdoor seating section reminiscent of a European café. During the summer, it is a great place to sit outside and enjoy some good food (and really good bread). And in pure John fashion, each year we bring with us a $5.99 bottle of “VT Hokie Bird Red” wine to celebrate. (The label does not even specify what kind of red wine, and that is your selection at the store, “red” or “white”) Well, two years down and two years in a row the bill has come and the restaurant has not included their $15 corking fee for the wine. So, thanks John, I know you had a hand in it! It would be a shame to pay a $15 corking fee on a $5.99 bottle of wine!

Miss ya, Bro.

A special request

As a special Father's day gift, I e-mailed Vin Scelsa, the dj of Idiot's Delight on WFUV. This is the radio show that dad has posted previously on the blog. I was going to surprise him by requesting a special song on this Saturday show, since it's the day before Father's Day and John's birthday. Unfortunately, I was not able to persuade him (clearly, if it was in person, there might have been a different outcome)but Mr. Scelsa did send a nice e-mail response that I give to Dad (and mom) for Father's Day. (Hey who else can say they gave Vin to Dad?)

"It is very difficult for me to acknowledge letters like this on the air and to fulfill such a request/dedication. I normally do not do so. Not because i don't sympathize with the people and families who write to me, but because if I started doing such things I would be inundated with similar requests.

I am humbled by the fact that your folks think so highly of my show. My heart goes out to them - and your entire family - over your loss. Please accept these words as my contribution to your Father's Day. I trust you'll understand why I couldn't say anything on the air.

Peace,
Vin Scelsa"

Things I Learned from My Son

Today being Fathers’ Day (and JW being born on Fathers’ Day) it seems an appropriate day to reflect upon the things I learned from my son.

Of course, it was from John’s Papa that I learned how to be a father – the best role model a son could ask for.

Also, it was because John’s Mammy & Papa took in foster babies while I was growing up that I learned how to change a dirty diaper and all the other logistics of fatherhood long before JW was born.

But from JW, being our first born, I learned the awesome responsibility of having another human being be totally dependent upon you.

I learned from my son (and from his Mama) what it feels like to love someone more than the gift of life itself.

I learned from JW that a parent’s ability to help shape another’s character ends at a pretty early age – that before you know it, you’ve done all you can do as a parent and that ultimately it is up to the child to make the most of what he is given, from both God and his parents.

I learned from my son the need to recognize life as the gift it is and the need to live it to the fullest at all times – an accomplishment at which JW doubtlessly succeeded.

I learned from JW the sheer joy of watching your boy grow up to be a good man – a very good man indeed.

I learned from my son how it is possible to live a truly holy life in a very unassuming way.

I learned from JW (and all my children) that a parent becomes truly wise when he recognizes just how much he can learn from his children.

I learned from my son what “Thy Will Be Done” means; that it simply means “my will not be done,” no matter how worthy and just I believe it to be. It does not necessarily mean God wills the opposite – it just means that I cannot live life expecting my will to prevail, no matter how noble I may think it is.

Finally, and most importantly, I learned from my son a better, albeit still imperfect, understanding of the loving, vulnerable, defenseless, and self-emptying generosity of God and his invitation to us to share in it.

Blessed

They say it’s the darkest right before the dawn

They say once you’ve hit rock bottom, you can only go up

They say time will heal…

That’s what they say, but do they really know?

What do I know?

I know your smile

I know your infectious laugh

I know your past mistakes

I know your fun times

I know the impact you’ve made,

Like footprints in the sand

Except unlike the beach that can wash away,

These footprints are forever on our hearts.

They say love makes us stronger

They say once you lose a person, he can live on in memories

They say time will heal…

That’s what they say, but do I really know?

What do I say?

I say I see your smile

I hear your laugh

I learn from your mistakes

I laugh at your fun times

I say I am blessed

For John on his birthday

A Day of Memories, Too

In addition to the post below, JW's birthday brings to mind so many splendid memories.

We were married less than a year when we thought that John's Mom was pregnant. We even went out and brought a bottle of champagne to celebrate. However, this was in the days before in-home pregnancy test kits and when the test results came back from the doctor's office, the word was that "the rabbit lived."

Nonetheless, John's Mom went back for another test in the following week or two and this time we got to open the champagne bottle when the test results came back "the rabbit died."

Next came the challenge of breaking the news to the rest of the family. It was November and we were at JW's Mammy and Papa's home and everyone was there, to include John's Grandma, to celebrate John's Dad's birthday. Following the cake and candles, John's Mom handed John's Dad a birthday card to "Daddy," and thus everyone came to know that JW was on his way.

When JW was eventually born, it was, of course, June. John's Mom & Dad were laying in bed in Great Neck, NY watching on TV the NBC Saturday Night at the Movies presentation of "The Battle of the Bulge" staring Henry Fonda, among others. In the middle of the movie, John's Mom's water breaks and we immediately head for the hospital where he was to be born, Syosset Hospital on Long Island. We never did get to learn who eventually won that battle.

The old saw is that early pregnancies are hard, and later pregnancies are easier. For John's Mom, the opposite was true; JW was the easiest and Jes was the hardest. In fact, upon arrival at the hospital in the middle of the night, the nurses noted that John's Mom was already dilating and immediately called the obstetrician. However, time passed and still no doctor. The nurse eventually called backed and it turned out that the doctor had rolled-over and had went back to sleep. He eventually got to the hospital and upon examination, immediately rolled John's Mom into the delivery room. As it turned out, the doctor came very close to missing the delivery.

Thus was how anxious JW was to enter into this world.

A Day of Celebration!

It was 33 years ago today, almost a third of a century ago, that JW came into this world. It is truly a day of celebration -- a day in which we commemorate what was -- not mourn what might have been. Everyone who was touched by John during the 30 short years he spent on this earth was truly blessed -- most of all John's parents. We are blessed not only with the thoughts of a life well-lived, but also blessed with found memories of birthday's past.

It wasn't that long ago that we embarrassed John by showing Alex old 8mm films of his first birthday in Hillsborough, NJ with his proud parents, grandparents and aunts in attendance.

We have the memories of birthdays spent at the SkateStation and Chuck E. Cheese's in Southern Maryland. We have the memorable 14th birthday celebrated in Ireland with John's Mammy & Papa during which he was presented with a ring his father wore most of his life and before that, his father's uncle and namesake (Uncle Billy). We never did have the courage to ask John as to the status of that ring until after his death when Alex confirmed that somehow he had lost it years earlier.

While John may not have been very good with protecting keepsakes such as his grand uncle's ring, he was very good at being an extraordinarily thoughtful and loving person to family and friends alike. Let there be no doubt -- the title of this blog solely refers to the too few years we all had to know John. In the years we did have, we all came to know John for the good man that he is.

Although published earlier on this blog, included herein is a copy of the note that John's Mom & Dad included in the birthday card for his 30th (and final) birthday. It says it all -- and we are so thankful that all was said when we had the chance. (Click on letter to read).

To a life well-lived, my son -- may you continue to be an inspiration to others!

Wrong Way Johnny

This past week, we celebrated with other family members the graduation of J.W.'s cousin Lisa from college. A good (and full) time was had by all.

The trip up to Long Island brought back memories of John's trip to Long Island several years ago to celebrate his cousin's graduation from high school. Whereas J.W.'s little brother has a built-in GPS system in his brain, John could get lost crossing the street. Sure enough, driving to Long Island that time, JW got lost on his way to his Aunt Meg's and Uncle Dom's. Fortunately, Long Island is an island and sooner or letter, as long as you don't go in circles, even if you don't know where you are going you'll hit water. Sure enough, after being overdue in his arrival in Hicksville, we got a phone call from John letting us know that he was at Jones Beach and looking for a way back. If not for the Atlantic Ocean, he could have ended up in Florida before he knew it.

You may not have known left from right or north from south while driving my son, but you certainly knew the direction of a life well-lived. Thanks for showing us the way.

Playing NAKID

Recall from earlier posts to include this one John's love of the game of kickball as played on the Mall in the District. We'll, it must have have been a slow news day the other day in that on page one, above the fold no less, the Washington Post had a rather prominent picture of JW's beloved kickball league, NAKID, playing the game on the Mall of our nation's capital. As always, click on the image to the right for a close-up.

Memorializing JW on the Radio

Regular readers of this blog know that a source of solace for John's family is music -- specifically music as played by Fordham University public radio in New York, WFUV. Being public radio, they have periodic fund drives and the other week, in addition to renewing our own membership, we did our best to increase the station's membership in memory of JW, who himself was a great lover of music. Listen to the audio clip as they struggle to figure out Avenue, MD.

A Mother's & Son's Love...

...those who knew JW and his Mom know that it is special.

Many Thanks...

... to all who have generously donated to the American Cancer Society's "Relay for Life." John's Mom is participating this year not only in memory of JW, but in the memory of her Dad as well as JW's Mammy, all of whom succumbed to this disease. She is participating as a member of the Team at her school, White Marsh Elementary.

If you'd like to see John's Mom's personal Relay for Life website, or would like to make a donation, simply click on this link. The White Marsh Elementary School Team website can be seen at this link.

Again, thanks for all your support. Relay gives us the unique opportunity to remember loved ones lost such as JW as well as his grandmother and grandfather and support the American Cancer Society’s lifesaving mission by fighting back against a disease that has already taken too much.

New Life

Today is Easter Sunday, the day we celebrate the "New Life" we have all inherited through the gift of God.

It was also two Easters ago that JW, in fulfillment of a life of giving, made his departing gift. In doing so, he made possible to others new life of a more corporal nature, contributing to the joy of so many families.

Click here for a reminder of John's ultimate gift and click here for a beautiful reflection by John's little sis as to how she came to understand his gift in a new way.

Thank you, JW. You and your legacy live on in so many ways.

April 7th

It was yesterday -- it was a lifetime ago -- it was two years ago. In many regards, time does not matter since it does not change the sense of loss. At the same time, it does not diminish the gifts that we have to include the memory of John as well as his everlasting love.

One of the things that the years bring to us all is wisdom -- and the greatest gift of wisdom which a parent can recognize is that we reach a time in our life where we begin to learn from our children.

This is Holy Week -- just as it was two years ago at this time. One of the many things we have learned from JW is that even though he did not realize that he was dying that week, he nonetheless could not have better lived the last week of his life even if he had known. And he did it not by acting out of the ordinary but rather by being his normal thoughtful, giving and loving self -- thinking of the needs of others such as Alex, his brother, his sister and his parents rather than himself. Although he had much to complain about that week, never once did he feel sorry for himself or complain of the tremendous discomfort he experienced. Instead he was concerned only about ensuring that he did not distract from the needs of others.

It is with great solace that we look back and recognize that JW's last week of life was truly a Holy Week in every sense of the word, as was the unassuming manner he which he lived his life from week-to-week. We should all be so fortunate to be able to say as much.

We are eternally grateful, son, for all the gifts you have given us and the wisdom which you imparted.

Remembering John

While everyday we each remember John in our own way, today we remembered John as a family. John's Aunt Sue and Uncle John, Aunt Ticia and Uncle Ken, and Aunt Meg and Uncle Dom joined Mike and Gina as well as Jes and Mom and Dad in performing a remembrance of John at his memorial. We enjoyed the sun and the cherry trees, we told stories and drank some more of John's homemade brew which is still amazingly good after more than two years of brewing. We placed a new Virginia Tech gnome on his memorial, the old one becoming quite weathered. In addition, all received a framed copy of the below photograph commemorating the three deceased men known to the world as John William Leonard, each of whom have left a legacy of his own for all of our benefit. (As always, click on the photo for a close-up).


Additional photos from today are below.

John's Scholarship Fund

The below is an update from Mother Catherine Spalding School with respect to what has recently been accomplished with JW's Technology Fund and what is planned for the future. Also below is a copy of the school's recent promotional brochure. As you can see, many of the initiatives highlighted in the brochure are associated with John's Fund. (You can click on each page to see an expanded view of the page).

New computers:

In December we installed 17 new computers in the computer lab using John's fund. These are allowing us to load more hardware and software. Our older computers were becoming limited and finicky. The computer lab looks great - newer computers are not as bulky as older ones were and the kids were really thrilled with the new lab.

Robotics Club

Our students in grades 4-8 participated in the LEGO'S Robotics Competition that was held at The College of Southern Maryland in LaPlata. The kids had a wonderful time preparing for the competition and participating in it. The students built a robot and a city floor plan. The robot was able to help build a dam in the river, built a home, put solar panels on the home and did several other activities. A great team building endeavor! The JW Tech fund paid one of our teachers a stipend for coaching the students. The team still meets once a week after school due to student demand that they not end the meetings. The gentleman from CSM just dropped off more "toys" for the teams that were still active to build another robot.

STEM Program

Initiated as an academy within the public school system, some of the parochial schools have been able to get on board with part of the STEM program. All of our students in grades 4-8 will be taking a trip to the local Navy base to tour different areas that coincide with their science curriculum. The JW fund is paying for the buses to take them to the base.

In addition, we have purchased new software for the students to remediate their reading comprehension. We have 2 students who needed books on cd's because of reading difficulties. These have helped immensely with their comprehension. One of the students made honor roll this past quarter!

Next school year we hope to continue the Robotics and STEM activities and would like to engage some of our brighter students with technology programs. We have enrichment one day a week but we really need time after school with the students - our school day is not long enough to incorporate all that we would like to do.

For those interested, tax-deductible contributions can still be made to:

MCSS for J.W. Leonard Technology Scholarship

and can be mailed to:

Mother Catherine Spalding School
Helen, MD 20635

Thanks to all for your continuing generosity in JW's memory and for helping the "Big Geek foster a lot of little geeks."

Renewal III

It's been stormy and windy the past several days, so the cherry trees are begin to loose their blooms. However, they are about at peek today, which is also John's little brother's 30th birthday.

Renewal II

Another year -- spring is here -- and perpetual life manifests itself all around us. Recall that central to John's memorial is a bench shaded by three cherry trees that are identical to those surrounding the Tidal Basin in Washington, DC. One of John’s last days was spent lying with Alex under the cherry trees at the Tidal Basin while they were in full bloom. His memorial is intended, in part, to forever bloom on the upcoming anniversary and as you can tell by this picture, that anniversary is approaching.

Renewal

As evidenced by his memorial, the love of JW, as does his memory, persists through the vicissitudes of life and time.